Friday, September 3, 2010

Five Tips to Setting Boundaries

Co-parenting with the ex-spouse can be challenging, even if a co-parenting agreement was entered after the divorce. Whether the ex-spouse is too intrusive or your partner is too friendly with the ex, create boundaries. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

1) Boundaries are about you. It is about what you will and will not allow, without being unethical, immoral, or contradictory to legal court documents (divorce or co-parenting decrees).

2) You can only control yourself. You cannot change your partner or the ex-spouse. The best you can hope for is to influence the other parties involved.

3) Communication between you and your partner should be open, honest, forthright, and consistent. Schedule regular meetings to discuss incidents and to add or change existing strategies.

4) An ex-spouse is the optimal person to communicate alterations or suggestions. Since ex-spouses are often resentful of the new partner (step parent), he/she will be less receptive to the step.

5) For explicit help for your situation, consult a Stepfamily Professional.

Everybody sets personal boundaries to stay emotionally and physically fit, but stepfamilies experience a plethora of predicaments to ponder. These suggestions are intended to be vague and may not help everybody.


Judy Graybill
Stepfamily Coach
Sensible Steps, LLC
Solutions for Today's Families
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judy@sensiblestepsolutions.com
407-739-4892

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